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September 15th, 2011

Top 10 Career Choices for Yahoo’s Ex-CEO Carol Bartz

Oops… You forgot it was Thursday, didn’t you? Too late, you’re here now. Time to subject yourself to another of our inane top ten lists.

Of course we couldn’t let the firing of Yahoo CEO Carol Bartz slide by without getting the top ten treatment. After all, they fired her on the telephone, then she went and showed us that she knows some words that are, er, not very polite. On top of that, she’s been willing to ignore a non-disparagement clause in her contract, possibly forfeiting over $14 million in money owed to her by Yahoo. Perhaps you can see how we might find this to be fodder for humor, no?

So, here it is, our list of the top 10 career choices for Yahoo’s ex-CEO Carol Bartz….

  1. Become CEO of MSN.com. Since they’ve never been very successful, they won’t be expecting much.
  2. Put her in charge of HP’s consumer PC division. They want to get rid of it anyway – maybe this will help.
  3. Become a professional drunken sailor. She’s got the vocabulary down.
  4. Do what every IT CEO does after being proved incompetent – run for public office.
  5. Two words: Roller derby.
  6. See if Mel Gibson needs a personal trainer.
  7. Become a contestant on Celebrity Apprentice.
  8. Partner with Charlie Sheen and start a finishing school.
  9. Write a book using her own story as an illustration of exactly how the Peter Principle works.
  10. Promise her old bosses at Yahoo she’ll never say another bad thing about them again, collect her $14 million severance and exit pay, go home and shut up!

Well, that’s the top ten career choices for Carol Bartz from our viewpoint. Perhaps you’ll have an idea or two of your own to post below….

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