Posts published in “Humor”

A FOSS Wish List for 2015

By Christine Hall on January 1, 2015 |

Distros, Hardware, Humor, Mobile and Software

First my FOSS predictions for 2015: cloud, systemd, vulnerabilities, containers, and Linus uses the “F” word.

Let’s forget predictions; they’re boring. They’re either too obvious or they’re not likely to happen. So is my wish list, with two major exceptions. First, wishes are much more subjective, making them much more fun for the wisher. Second, when predictions don’t happen, they’re wrong. When I wish for things and they don’t happen, they’re still things I wish for, so they’re not wrong, they’re just not happening. Caution must be exercised, however. Remember the old proverb ascribed to the Chinese about the possibility of wishes coming true…

Oh, one last thing about how I wish. Sometimes I wish in very great detail. My friends who believe in magic tell me this is good, that it will help bring my wishes to fruition. Time will tell. Stay tuned…

Christine Hall

Christine Hall has been a journalist since 1971. In 2001, she began writing a weekly consumer computer column and started covering Linux and FOSS in 2002 after making the switch to GNU/Linux. Follow her on Twitter: @BrideOfLinux

FOSSForce.com

Welcome to the Pre-Post-PC Era

By Larry Cafiero on December 24, 2014 |

Hardware, Humor and Mobile

And the hits just keep on coming…

Today’s float on the parade of the PC-is-dead prognostications comes from The Register, which says, “At the very moment that Linux desktops seem to be reaching new levels of sophistication, polish and ‘just works’ ease-of-use, the entire future of the desktop computer (by which I also mean laptop) feels in doubt.”

The only thing that’s in doubt is whether that sentence is anywhere near remotely accurate. But let’s put that aside for a moment and assume we can see the future of how we deal with our digital lives.

Sure, you can see a Post-PC future from here all right. Of course, you’re going to need the Hubble to do so.

Naturally, there are things that you can do with your Post-PC apparatus, like surf the web, watch videos and all those important digital activities. But bear in mind that you’re not going to be using Blender on your smartphone.

Larry Cafiero

Larry Cafiero, a.k.a. Larry the Free Software Guy, is a journalist and a Free/Open Source Software advocate. He is involved in several FOSS projects and serves as the publicity chair for the Southern California Linux Expo. Follow him on Twitter: @lcafiero

Sony & North Korea: Dumb & Dumber

By Christine Hall on December 22, 2014 |

Business, Copyright, Humor, Media, News, Politics and Security

Hacking, hacking, everywhere hacking. And not the good kind either. We’re talking cracking hacking.

Take the Sony hack for instance. Bunches of movies set for Christmas release are now available online for free, for those willing to break the law and invoke the displeasure of the MPAA while firing up the ol’ BitTorrent. Worse than that: even more bunches of Sony employees have had their financial lives turned upside down, with all of their personal information leaked. Not so bad, however, is the news that “The Interview” won’t be making an appearance on a screen near you anytime soon.

Oddly, it’s that last tidbit that’s been getting the most press. That, and the ongoing argument on who’s to blame for the Sony crack hack.

At first, U.S. authorities said that the North Koreans didn’t do it. Then they said they did. The North Koreans countered with a “no-way-Jose” and offered to help in the hunt to find the real culprit, which elicited an adamant “no-way-back-atcha” from the U.S.

Christine Hall

FOSSForce.com

Linux & FOSS Predictions for 2015

By Larry Cafiero on December 19, 2014 |

Distros, Humor, Operating Systems and Software

You can tell it’s the holiday season — a lot of people are focusing more on the guy with the red suit who looks quite a bit like Jon ‘maddog’ Hall than they are on digital matters. This also is the time of year, naturally, where pundits make their predictions for the following year.

However, I should admit something here. Truth in advertising: I don’t have a good record in predicting the future. I have a hard enough time predicting what to wear the following day — oh, right: clothes. But Linux and FOSS being, well, Linux and FOSS, these projections are as good as any prediction now being foisted on the FOSS public by the army of digital pundits out there.

So what’s going to happen in 2015?

A lot. Like…

Larry Cafiero

Breakthrough in Wireless Technology…Or Not

Breakthrough in Wireless Technology…Or Not

By Ken Starks on October 7, 2014 |

Hardware, Humor and Operating Systems

Exactly three weeks ago today I caught myself before hitting the “share” button on my Google Plus stream. My intent was to complain about some thing or another. I believe it was an out loud groan about a USB wireless device not working out of the box with Linux. I think I was going to triangulate on Broadcom’s insistence on making wireless a real headache.

And yeah, it doesn’t take that much to get a Broadcom chip working in most cases. Unless you are installing Linux at a friend’s house or another place that doesn’t have a wired connection. Then you’re pretty much sunk. The popup says that the wireless will work once you connect to the package manager. Uh, what if I am not located near a wired connection? That’s kinda why I wanted to connect to the web anyway you friggin’ ijit.

Let’s say it together…you’re pretty much sunk. Still. In 2014. Sunk.

There are a lot of other things that are deserving of our collective ire. Wireless shouldn’t have been one of them for me. I chastised myself for throwing my own little private snit concerning something so trivial. If you count back the years with me, the kernel update to 2.27 saw wireless go from “wireless sucks in Linux” to “holy crap, wireless works in Linux.” Or it did for the most part anyway. It was an important mile marker for desktop Linux.

Ken Starks

Ken Starks is the founder of the Helios Project and Reglue, which for 20 years provided refurbished older computers running Linux to disadvantaged school kids, as well as providing digital help for senior citizens, in the Austin, Texas area. He was a columnist for FOSS Force from 2013-2016, and remains part of our family. Follow him on Twitter: @Reglue

linuxlock.blogspot.com/

You Know What Bugs Me About FOSS…?

You Know What Bugs Me About FOSS…?

By Larry Cafiero on September 26, 2014 |

Desktops, Distros, Humor and Operating Systems

Earlier in the week, my FOSS Force colleague Ken Starks wrote a very poignant column on these pages about how there’s no room for the kind of bullying and other varieties of douchebaggery which seems to appear all too often in forums.

That’s something that really bugs me. Not the fact that Ken brought it up, of course, but the fact that people don’t have the common decency to act with civility in the public realm. When someone responded they way they did to Ken as he describes, I’m grabbing some popcorn because Ken has the unique ability to use words like a Ginsu knife to slice and dice such hapless assclowns before they know what hit them.

But back to my point: The lack of civility and reasonable goodwill that some malcontents show in the FOSS realm bothers me.

Do you know what else bothers me? Glad you asked.

Larry Cafiero

King Ellison Abdicates As Oracle CEO

King Ellison Abdicates As Oracle CEO

By Christine Hall on September 18, 2014 |

Business and Humor

Damn it! All of the colorful bad guys of proprietary tech are aging out, leaving in their place boring button down folk with all the charm expected from accountants.

You’ve no doubt already heard that Larry Ellison stepped down this afternoon as CEO of Oracle, though he’ll be sticking around for a while in his new position as executive chairman. In other words, he’s still the boss by way of being the boss’s boss – and by dint of the fact that he remains the company’s biggest shareholder with a 25% stake in the business.

Why is he quitting? Probably because he’s getting old and he can afford to retire; he turned 70 last month. Officially, according to him and the once and future king’s yes-men, it’s all part of carefully laid-out succession plans – meet-the-new-boss, the-king-is-dead and all that.

As much as I loathe Mr. Ellison, I really hate to see him go, especially that part of me that thinks I’m a writer — a FOSS writer. Who’s left for FOSS press brickbats?

You see, Larry Ellison is one of the last, maybe the last, really good and colorful bad guys left on the tech scene.

Who’s left to be the target for split infinitive armed verbal bombs from wanna be hotshot FOSS reporters? Mark Hurd and Safra Catz, Oracle’s co-presidents who’ve now been elevated to the status of co-CEOs? Meh. Not unless Hurd again decides he wants to dip his pen in the wrong inkwell and then use company money to clean up the mess — but I don’t think he’s going to do that. Not at Oracle. Ellison would break his legs if he did. Remember, even though Ellison’s gone, he’s not most sincerely gone.

Christine Hall

FOSSForce.com

Linux Tech Support & Time Warner

By Ken Starks on September 16, 2014 |

Hardware, Humor and Internet

I’ve spent my time in the tech support trenches…and someone else’s time as well. Please mark my dues paid in full. I’ve worked from the script-reader doing basic trouble-shooting, up to floor supervisor and level three support. My point? Not everybody who works support at a call center is an idiot, but some certainly are…

Since 2005, I have helped financially-disadvantaged kids get computers in their homes. While it’s become a cliché in the past few years, the “digital divide” most certainly exists. Since our early days of Komputers4Kids, The HeliOS Project and now Reglue, the gap between the tech haves and have-nots remains a problem.

Way more than many of us would think.

With that being established, I want to take a walk down memory lane…to let’s say 2005.

Back then, getting a Linux computer bolted-up to broadband internet was straight forward. Even nine years ago, the biggest challenge to getting Time Warner or eternal-hell-and-damnation Comcast routers online might have been to reboot the router.

Maybe. The majority of the time, not even that.

So imagine my surprise when I wasn’t able to get one of our established Reglue kids online. The oldest boy, Rex, had been using his Reglue computer for four years and it was time for an upgrade. I was working with a brand new Time Warner modem and wireless router, out of the box. I even went back in and made sure I was accessing the modem properly. I was. This task shouldn’t have taken ten minutes and I was now on minute thirty.

Ken Starks

linuxlock.blogspot.com/

Random Thoughts, Cheap Shots, Bon Mots…

Random Thoughts, Cheap Shots, Bon Mots…

By Larry Cafiero on September 3, 2014 |

Distros, Humor, Internet and Operating Systems

To say that things are going at breakneck speed in the FOSS world –- so much so that it’s hard to keep track of –- well, that would be a lie. However, there are a few things that popped up on the proverbial radar over the past week…

Ruth Suehle added to Ohio LinuxFest keynoter lineup: Yep, the Raspberry Pi queen and ruler of all she surveys in the realm of Red Hat’s Open Source and Standards group, Ruth has joined the list of keynoters for the October event in Columbus. Ruth participates in the Fedora Project and is co-author of “Raspberry Pi Hacks” (written with fellow Red Hatter Tom Callaway). She also leads discussions about open source principles at opensource.com, and serves as a senior editor at GeekMom.com.

Chances are that if you’ve ever been to a major Linux/FOSS conference –- or a major sci-fi/anime con –- you’ve probably heard Ruth speak. She joins Jon “maddog” Hall and fellow FOSS Force correspondent Ken Starks as OLF keynoters. Ohio LinuxFest will be held at the Greater Columbus Convention Center on October 24-25.

Linus being Linus: No shrinking violet by anyone’s standards, Linus Torvalds addressed the wider Debian community on Sunday at Debconf in Portland, and his talk had people agreeing and disagreeing, sometimes simultaneously.

Larry Cafiero

Reflections On the Day

Reflections On the Day

By Ken Starks on September 2, 2014 |

Humor

I have not paid attention to my birthday for over 30 years.

Personally, I think it’s a bit arrogant of me to put any significance on this random day or to even acknowledge it as anything other than just another day. I don’t think this way about other people’s birthdays. I celebrate with them on their special days. It’s just that on my birthday I would just as soon go about my bid’ness like I did yesterday or the day before.

Something has changed about the way I look at birthdays now. I’ve often said that the only reason humans “invented” time was to mark the progress of our inevitable demise or, in my case, proximity to almost passing.

Ken Starks

linuxlock.blogspot.com/

Computer Dating, Linux Style

Computer Dating, Linux Style

By Ken Starks on August 6, 2014 |

Humor and Operating Systems

Look…let’s face this together. Dating can suck.

When you’re young, it’s an adventure. One has relatively little baggage, the emotional scars are few and you haven’t even begun to think about dating’s therapeutic value yet. In other words, the dating world is your oyster.

Then you find yourself at midlife, when you’ve accumulated a large pool of of crises. You know, stuff like that divorce or two under your belt, some strong political or religious beliefs that are deeply ingrained and…oh yeah…that messy conviction for hacking that’s still on your record. These are things that tend to narrow down the potential list of candidates for life-long bliss.

Ken Starks

linuxlock.blogspot.com/

Spacewalk 2025

FOSDEM 2025

SCALE 22x (Southern California Linux Expo)

Early Adopter Tech Summit

All Things Open AI

Posts published in “Humor”

A FOSS Wish List for 2015

Welcome to the Pre-Post-PC Era

Sony & North Korea: Dumb & Dumber

Linux & FOSS Predictions for 2015

Breakthrough in Wireless Technology…Or Not

You Know What Bugs Me About FOSS…?

King Ellison Abdicates As Oracle CEO

Linux Tech Support & Time Warner

Random Thoughts, Cheap Shots, Bon Mots…

Reflections On the Day

Computer Dating, Linux Style